How To Boost Confidence

Assertiveness training gives people more self-confidence, and for many people the skills they gain from taking an course in assertiveness allows them to avoid becoming victims and to live their lives more fully. The ability to say ‘no’ freely and without guilt as well as asking for what you want are some of the additional side benefits of boosting your assertiveness skills. If you feel challenged by this issue, then taking classes that will help you strengthen these abilities may be for you.

Assertiveness training protects you

According to SelfDefense4Women.com, people who victimize others are looking for an easy target. People who are self-confident have less of a chance of being victimized, because, “assertive people know their rights and respect the rights of others,” according to the site.

Some of the rights that assertive people know that they have include knowing that they have the right to change their minds, the right to prevent others from taking advantage of them and to the right to avoid being manipulated by people. If you feel guilty about exercising these rights, the site recommends first and foremost that you be direct and make your ‘nos’ mean no and your ‘yeses’ mean yes without apologizing for either one.

Self-esteem issues

Learning to be more assertive can challenge some people, because those around them will sometimes say that they are being selfish by saying ‘no’ and exerting their new-found confidence, according to the website More-Selfesteem.com. The site goes on to say that part of the reason is that a misconception exists about what being assertive means. Often being pushy and aggressive is thought to be the same thing as being assertive, but it’s not. Proper training teaches people the difference, which primarily means speaking freely and standing up for yourself. Truly assertive people have their own sense of power and confidence, and they treat others with kindness and respect. Really it is the embodiment of the Golden Rule.

In work and life

A lack of self-confidence creates all sorts of issues for the non-assertive person. Assertive people ask for promotions and raises at work, make many friends and are able to verbally communicate their ideas. Additionally, many people who lack self-esteem, also tend to have more issues with substance abuse. The Oregon Family website attributes in part to an inability to say ‘no’ to peers who use drugs and alcohol. Many times, these issues carry over into adulthood.

Developing confidence

Assertiveness training can start early in life. Kids who grow up in a family that positively models assertive behaviors have a better chance of growing up with these skills. However, it’s never too late for you to learn. Exercises as simple as practicing different scenarios and the possible responses to them as well as taking small steps like saying ‘no’ when making minor decisions helps to pave the way for using these skills when the stakes are higher. With practice you can learn to navigate your way around many different types of situations and personality types, asserting your position without overdoing it.